Sex toys were once considered to be a dirty little secret. But studies now show that the taboos surrounding adult toys made for mutual or individual pleasure are decreasing as more and more couples and individuals are open to spicing up their sex lives, and embracing intimate tools is a big part of that. One thing we can say for sure is that the past decade was a testament to the increasing popularity of sex toys.
Enhancing sexual enjoyment is undoubtedly one of the main benefits of using sex toys. But how do sex toys impact individuals and couples psychologically?
To shed light on the commonly untouched topic, here are just some of the psychological benefits of using sex toys both for individuals and for couples:
1. It encourages healthy communication.
Once you and your partner enter the world of sex toys, you’ll find out that opening up to each other is not that difficult, and in fact is quite pleasurable. Exploring using sex toys you can show your partner how you want to be pleasured, and vice versa.
Sex toys allow you both to safely explore various sensations, stimulation areas, and simultaneous pleasure points. Ultimately, you both discover what makes you feel good and what doesn’t. From there, you can explore each others’ roadmaps together.
Telling your sexual partner about what makes you feel good is a sign of healthy communication, which is vital to any relationship. Maintaining that level of openness and honesty lets you connect more to each other, and maintain that connection.
Not to mention that all of this healthy communication aides in developing trust, which frankly, is key maintaining psychologically healthy relationships. This is proven by study after study showing that couples who communicate more tend to have more fulfilling relationships, both in and out of the bedroom, than those who don’t.
2. It boosts self-esteem and self-confidence.
It seems the days when people feel embarrassed to use vibrators and cock rings to pleasure yourself or your partner are gone. Contrary to popular belief, sex toys do not decrease both men’s & women’s self-esteem and self-confidence. In fact, using sex toys increases self-esteem and self-confidence.
With the help of sex toys, you’ll know what turns you, and/or your partner on and off. This alone boosts your self-esteem and self-confidence because you’ll know how to clearly express yourself in bed, solo or with a partner.
Dr. Donaghue, a sex therapist and psychotherapist, said that those who masturbate regularly using sex toys are more likely to feel positive about their bodies than those who don’t.
Additionally, knowing the ins and outs of your body through sex toys lets you appreciate your body more. Not to mention, exploring the various adult toy options also helps you feel sexier in bed, which clearly translates to higher sexual awareness.
3. It can help relieve stress and anxiety.
We all need a break and in a world filled with stress-inducing and anxiety-causing jobs, finding a way to relieve yourself from them is crucial to your well-being.
Sexual release, especially with the help of sex toys, is necessary to live life well. The act relaxes the body’s systems and releases a variety of hormones, all of which have to work in sync to destress and our essential to our well being, happiness, and just make you feel good.
However, when you don’t have a sexual partner or are just too busy to have intercourse, sexual release isn’t always possible.
This is where sex toys come to the rescue. Adult toys may be a novel way to curb the effects of stress and anxiety, but they are effective. Take it from the subjects of studies that correlated sexual release and stress relief.
Sexual release jumpstarts the production of endorphins, oxytocin, and dopamine― hormones that are crucial in dealing with stress and anxiety.
4. It promotes sexual satisfaction.
When you and your lover’s minds open up to new things, sex toys become a reliable way to keep things exciting in bed (and sometimes out of bed, too). And after getting comfortable using adult toys in the bedroom, individuals and couples have the opportunity to continue to explore (and who wouldn’t want to) the sex toy market and the infinite possibilities it has to offer. And all of that exploration leads to more and more variety.
And speaking of variety, partners who include variety in the bedroom tend to be more open & honest about their sexual desires, and stick together in the long run. Trying new sexual routines lowers the likelihood of cheating, decreases boredom, and improves sexual satisfaction.
Not to mention, using sex toys increases the quality of foreplay, which is essential in creating great sexual experiences. You can tantalize and tease your partner before you get it on. The more excited you and your partner get each other before sex, the more gratification sex will bring.
5. It eliminates judgments.
When you and your partner talk about using sex toys, your judgments about using sex toys altogether decrease. Discussing about sex toys in a manner respectful of each other’s preferences and boundaries cultivates a non-judgmental atmosphere. You also realize that these sex toys aren’t just in no way a replacement for the real thing, but rather an accessory to fun and fulfilling each other.
Many men are afraid of being judged for using sex toys, or even worse, thinking that an adult toy is in direct competition with their manhood. Many women also feel they should be ashamed for pleasuring themselves, especially when it involves adult toys. However, these ideas are negative, because the gives the wrong idea about sex toys.
Van Kirk, a certified sex therapist and marriage counsellor stated that an existing sense of openness and non-judgmental attitude allows more people to incorporate new things in their sexual routine, including the use of sex toys.
He further said that this helps you clear things about using sex toys and debunk long-existing myths. Talking and using sex toys also let you educate each other about the advantages of using them. For example, the fact that most women do not orgasm through penetration alone should be a valid reason to use a sex toy.
6. It can help you sleep better.
Sleep… the other important thing that happens in bed. Getting enough, good-quality sleep is crucial for someone to maintain optimal well-being. In fact, sleep is just as important as eating a balanced diet exercising regularly.
While we sleep, the body gets to recharge and repair itself to be ready for the next day. It strengthens one’s immune system, makes the brain perform well, and prevents libido from decreasing.
Sex and masturbation with adult toys can help in getting a good night’s sleep, according to Dr. Donaghue, a renowned sex therapist. Oxytocin and endorphins, as mentioned earlier, are released during orgasm. They are often referred to as happy hormones, and these hormones calm you down, and allow you to sleep better.
So you see, sex toys aren’t something to be ashamed of, but rather celebrated for the physical pleasure and the psychological benefits they provide.